i'm a little less negative now. either it doesn't hurt as badly, or i'm growing numb.

i just can't figure out things. that's not like me, or at least it usually doesn't take this long.

we had this conversation monday and it went like this:
i said something about not liking something he likes.
him: "what?! i want a divorce! this relationship is over!"
me: "what relationship? i thought there was none."
him: "you have to admit, this is the best relationship either of us have had in the last 7 years."
me: "if you say so..."

i want to be friends. he's pretty good about putting things into perspective for me and making me laugh when i feel like i can't go another day. even with everything, he still makes me happier than anyone else. i'm just afraid that i want to be friends for the wrong reasons - reasons that include him realizing i am the greatest woman in the world and his life would be empty without me. ;)

so do you see why i can't figure this out? talk about frustrating!