if i weighed 135, would you give in to my relentless, yet subtle advances?

even more randomness


i started writing something yesterday, but then i clicked on a link to some twenty questions site and i lost my post. and i think it was a very good post. unfortunately that was 24 hrs ago so i have no way to recreate such genius.

i know i was apologizing for a lot of things. sometimes i just get where i feel like i haven't said i'm sorry enough so i go on these awful 'please forgive me' rants.

i got a new job at the TV station working under Nathan. i work 4-midnight M-F in addition to my CLEST job from 7:30-3:30 M-F. at least my weekends are free. i'll be bringing home twice as much money as i have been, so maybe now i can become self-sufficient. i just want to be able to make a car payment when January rolls around.

i haven't been feeling well. i'm not sure if i'm just flat out getting sick or if it's whatever my mystery illness is coming back to haunt me. i've been really tired too. and i can't sleep at night. i keep having these weird dreams about people i don't even talk to. i think when saturday gets here i'm going to spend a lot of it sleeping. or maybe sunday since i like to watch football on saturdays.

i want to apologize for my lack of interesting writing lately. i just haven't had the motivation to go on a political tirade. and the blogmonster is a lot better at it than i am. he usually says what thoughts are in my head, and then he uses periodicals to back him up. i just expect you to take what i say in earnest. i think that's part of the reason why i'm just not so proactive right now. that and did i mention i'm tired?

i'm having a pretty girlie week. very sensitive. very emotional. VERRRRRY whiny. i just don't have anyone to whine to, so i annoy myself instead of others. i woke up in the middle of the night last night and i felt awful and the first thought that came to mind was not how i could make myself feel better but "why can't someone be here to take care of me when i'm sick?!" and i pouted about it for a while before i made myself get out of bed to get a cold washcloth. that's pretty sad, huh.

i'm sitting here listening to the crickets outside.

i need to decide who i'm going to see JM with in November. and i need to make sure i'm still going to see Staind with the boys in a couple of weeks. if not, i need to get rid of my tickets. i will go see JM by myself. that will not bother me like going to mb20 did. it's John Freakin Mayer for crying out loud. ;) so if you're not annoying, and you want to go, tell me. it's on a saturday night so don't tell me you have to work. and who knows...you might even get lucky. heh heh.

and no, don't email me propositioning sex. i'm not going to throw off my clothes for just any internet psycho.

<3