bad blogger. bad


for some reason i was thinking that i hadn't posted in two weeks. but now that i look at it, i said something on sunday. so i'm not as bad as i thought.

i have been sick practically all week. damn arkansas weather. it was 90 degrees most of this week and today it's 40. not that i'm complaining. today is an example of my favorite days: cloudy and cold with a brisk N-NW wind. yay! i freakin hate hot weather and when it sticks around until freakin November, i get pissy. and i get sick obviously. i'm just happy i get to dig out my pretty sweaters and coats and hoodies and long sleeves. muy bien!

so i took off work yesterday and today b/c i'm sick. and then like tues and weds i left at lunch and went home and took a nap before TV work. i can't take off there yet, but there's really no point b/c all i do is sit and watch 8 tv monitors and talk to people. who cares if you're sick? i'm doing my housework today b/c i really didn't want to lay in bed. i did that yesterday. tomorrow i'll probably go by the office and catch things up. i'm supposed to be off monday and tuesday is a holiday. i don't know if i'm still going to be off monday or not. depends on how much needs to get done tomorrow. i work a lot faster when people aren't around and the phone isn't ringing.

this week i have been discrepancy free. which is very very good. means my stations have no excuse to not be making money. unfortunately, the pot for the bonuses has diminished to less than 4k (it started at 5k) so i'm thinking that by the time the end of november rolls around, everyone may get like $20 for their bonus. which sucks ass, and is totally not fair b/c my shift has been perfect this week and it's those morons in the daytime that fuck off and screw everyone up.

i got my john mayer tickets in the mail finally. it's a week away! yayayayay! they give away random meet n greet passes to people in the fan club (that's how i got 2nd row tix) so now i'm praying for one of those. that would be so awesome to get to meet him and have our pic taken and stuff. and i'll have to find something to get him to sign. i'm not holding my breath though. i love him and i think his music is awesome, but i'm not super freak fan that's going to cry or faint or anything. i'd just be like "hey, john. i'm laurie. i think you and your music are incredible and i just wanted to say thanks. and can i have a picture?" and then maybe later i'd throw in that he should find me after the show and we could make out or something. hahah. i'm kidding. i can't even tell a friend that i want to make out, much less a complete stranger. but put a little alcohol in me and maybe things would be different. hehe. just kidding there too. i don't drink anymore.

now you know, next sunday i'll be totally gushing about how wonderful the show was.

my friend ross has a blog now. check it out at: rossthebandnerd.blogspot.com. i'm converting so many people over to blogger. haha. of course most of those people use their blog for like a month and then they forget and move on. i've always had something like this though, so it's natural for me to come here and write about something, at least once a week. before it was like everyday, but girl has so much going on nowadays, she barely has time to tie her shoelaces.

i guess i'm going to go get dressed and stuff. i'll be around.


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i've got nothing to say

that's usually when i say the most, isn't it?


i'm feeling sorta lonely today. like i'm lost and i don't know who to turn to. now before you jump up and say "hey! what about me?" sit back down. it's nothing a friend can do. i just am in one of my "i want to be held" moods.

my crush on mike has faded. he's becoming more annoying than anything. he acts like he cares and is interested in what you say, but it's apparent he's not. and then he expects you to help him with whatever is bothering him. it doesn't work like that. most of the people there are getting on my nerves actually. but, in a way, it's nice because i sit on a row by myself and it's easy to ignore what goes on behind you. sometimes i wish there was someone i could bs with, but it's hard to concentrate on work when you're goofing off.

ryan left wednesday morning. he brought me my tables tuesday night after i got home from work. i'm really going to miss him. i already do! he was very angry b/c the army fucked him (and the rest of the 34th) over. they kept promising the guys time off before they left for Ft. Hood, and then instead they worked 17 hour days and decided the day before they were leaving that they were in fact leaving. those guys should not have been treated that way. especially since they are going to be gone probably until 2005.

i used to like ryan you know. i'd like him for a few weeks and then i'd stop b/c we quit talking or he was sleeping with whores or whatever, and then i'd go back to liking him b/c things got better between us. i really wanted to tell him and i was going to before he left, but apparently in his search for acceptance and consoling he went back to the bitch he hated when we first became friends. i'm no match for an ex-girlfriend. i did meet her though. she didn't say anything but "hi" to me. she's kinda trashy looking. very short. very skinny. stringy blonde hair. i was surprised she was there when i went to his apt that night. and he didn't tell me she was there until we were about to walk in the front door. it was sort of disappointing because after that, i had no desire to tell him anything.

i'm just going to miss our current events chats. he'd get all excited about politics and government affairs and i loved that. i get excited about those things too! and since i started working all the time, he was keeping me updated on what was going on. now he's working all the time too, so it's hopeless. he said he'd write me, but i doubt it. i probably won't ever see him again.

well that was depressing.

that's why i'm lost though. i don't even lust after anyone right now. the past two (see above) shouldn't really count because both of them were impossible to obtain, but at least it was something to dream about. now i'm just stuck with nothing. john mayer will be here in two weeks though. does that count?

blah. i think i'm going to go to sleep. another exciting workweek begins in less than 12 hours.

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